You may feel out of place in this world, but know that God has a purpose for your life.
I grew up in a military home and we had to travel to new homes quite often. Therefore, I always had to make new friends, which played a big part in why I often felt lonely and left out. Most places I moved to, the people there already knew each other and it took a while to become acquainted with them. Once I hit middle school, many kids including myself, had a rough time. From being picked on, lied on, lied to, discrimination, and the list can go on.
Growing up I would try to force myself to fit in with everyone else. During middle school, I tried getting involved with every clique at my school trying to figure out where I belonged, but I fit into none. It got to a point where I considered bullies as friends that were just hard on me and I’d do almost anything to get them to like me. Crazy right. I remember every morning students had to wait outside the school in the courtyard until the school was open. Everyone was in their own group of friends and I always stood along the school fence.
I remember an older friend from church passed down some clothes to me. She gave me these baby phat jeans, with purple stitching in them and an off-white baby phat coat with fur. I saw no problem with wearing this to school because most of the other students always had the nicest clothes in my opinion. For some reason, the girls at my school were really jealous and crowded around me and made fun of me for wearing it, and even tried to take it and ruin it. I typically didn’t wear those types of clothes, which probably made me stand out, but at the time I thought they’d help me fit in. They didn’t know it was handed down to me, but I couldn’t believe they’d react in that way towards someone they never talk to.
That small portion of my middle school story was just an example of the many situations where I’ve felt rejected by the world even when I tried to fit societal standards.
Many of my friendships never worked, very good at making friends but could not keep them. I always thought something was wrong with me. I didn’t get the friendship support that I saw other people had.
I did not understand why I felt so rejected by the world, but it was evident that I wanted more than what the world had to offer and that my family values were so near and dear to me. Christ, Family, and Education. As I grew older I refused to do what my “friends” wanted me to do, I kept those values ingrained in my mind and they kept me grounded. I also knew I’d get in trouble if I did half the things my “friends” did.
In John 17: 18-19 it says, “ 18) If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. 19) If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. “
This scripture helped me realize that because I belong to Christ and put him before anything else in the world, the world will reject me. This scripture makes being rejected not as bad as it seems, because Jesus went through rejection, but also because he says we belong to him. He will always be there for us and he wouldn’t put you through anything he hasn’t gone through. Yes, it is great to have people around you to vibe with and have fun, but we are here for a greater purpose.
I realized that God was setting me apart to build me up; he wasn’t putting me to the side to waste away. God saw a greater calling for my life and wanted me to realize that I needed to work on a personal relationship with him so that my purpose can be fulfilled. He wants this for everyone on earth.
You are set apart by God for God.
Many of you may have felt or feel like you’ve been blocked from having a social life, forgotten about, and may have wondered why God allowed this to happen in your life.
You were not set to the side and forgotten about; you were set apart, reserved, and protected so that God could do a mighty work in and through you. The gifts you have, God wants to help and equip you to be able to withstand what will come on your journey.
Remember the story of Joseph? He had the gift of interpreting dreams; his jealous brothers sold him into slavery. Of course, God could have stopped it from happening, but there was a greater plan (purpose). Let me tell you, Joseph was alone and felt abandoned by his family but the Lord was always with him and showed favor. He was even tempted by the pharaoh’s wife, falsely accused, and placed in jail, but he remained faithful to God. Eventually, Joseph had the opportunity to use the gift God had given him. He interpreted the pharaoh’s dream, it leads to his release, and he became one of the most powerful men in Egypt allowing him to fulfill the lords’ promise.
(The story of Joseph: Genesis 37: 1-44:9)
This example shows how being set apart brings glory to God. Life may seem unusual and unfair in the process, but the Lord is always with us. In the times we feel isolated (set apart) learn and grow from the process because he is preparing us for far more greater things we could ever imagine.
-Other examples of great people who were set apart are David and Ruth.
You are set apart, not set aside.
Some ways I believe God set me apart:
Friends: When it comes to friendships I believe that God was showing me that I shouldn’t depend on other people or seek affirmation from them. Instead, look to him for all my needs. He also taught me how to be a friend and what a real friendship should look like. He was trying to protect me from becoming a gossiper, a user, and everything else my flesh desired to do. Those were not qualities of a true friend. The people who I have a real relationship with now are on the same path as I am, we build each other up and encourage one another. The people I thought were friends our relationships ended quickly. God set me apart from those who aren’t fit for the life he has planned for me.
Maturity: I never seemed to connect with people my age I always had friends that were older than me. It’s not like I didn’t want to be friends with people my age, I just seemed to connect with older peers. I’ve been told that growing up I had a mature, old soul. My mannerism, the way I thought, the way I carried myself was more mature than my peers. Many people thought I was older than what I actually was. I believe my maturity automatically set me apart.
Humiliation: In many ways, the things I have gone through has humbled me. God is setting me apart from pride and welcoming humility into my heart.
~Intentionality~
I have learned that being intentional with your time to focus on God is important.
Meaning, to intentionally set yourself apart from the world and focus on God.
God will get our attention and tell us to refocus on him, but its a two way street in any relationship.
Take the time to distance from everything and focus on God.
There are many ways to spend time with God.
For example, daily devotional time reading, praying, and/or worshiping with the Lord. A time of silence just thinking about God and his goodness. Serving others. Fellowshipping with other believers in God.
There is a purpose in being set apart.
*Testimony: I’ve had old friends come to me and tell me that they respect me for staying true to what I believe. It changed their perspective on Christ and the people who choose to follow him. I was blown away when I was told this. By staying true to my beliefs and overcoming the fear of rejection, it helped change the way people in my life thought about Christ.
I encourage you to do the same.
What are your thoughts? Did I miss anything? Do you consider yourself to be someone set apart? How has being set apart affected your life and relationship with Christ?
—Love, Shardea’ Nicole
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-D2R-
Designed to Radiate 
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